The Intergalactic Bouncy-ball Conglomeration (IBC, a subsidiary of the root beer oligarchy) has canceled many Bouncy-ball contests, because the rich “owners” and the rich “players” can’t agree how to split their vast winnings. (No one really loses in Televised Sports, other than the general IQ.) This tears at our hearts, and at the fabric of society.
A traveling freak show cannot exist in a vacuum. Someone has to hire the freaks, feed ‘em, drive ‘em from town to town, and set up the tent. Better treat ‘em well, the dancers kick higher when they’re well fed.
Today’s Sports Cathedrals cost lots and generate paying jobs for many. The Cathedral Operators deserve a share of the loot, but would have no loot without their Leaping Ballmen, who similarly would have nothing if not for the gigantic Bouncy-ball institution and its clueless enthusiasts. The fact that these freaky rich folk will intentionally lose money rather than agree is sure proof that every player, from the owner down, makes way too much.
Excepting, of course, the vendors, janitors, ticket takers, secretaries, administrative assistants, and the like. Thus, two solutions to this unmeasurably meaningless impasse:
One, take whatever figure divides the two main parties, and spread it out among the aforementioned Grunt Laborers. A couple bucks an hour raise might mean they can afford Grandma’s medicine each month, their rent without struggling, and such.
Solution two is for angry Bouncy-ball worshippers: quit giving the already-rich your money. Cancel the tickets, turn off the cable, give away the posters, and go to the park/gym and play ball with the neighbor kids. The bounce of your Beer Belly and Couch Bottom may be the best freak show yet--live!
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